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 I have a 2 year shih Tzu that has been biting since a pup. its full on draw blood . I love him so much it saddens me ever since we brought him home. he has a fun personality ,very loving towards everyone except me and my husband.  He bites me more even though I spend all my time with him and take him with me as much as I can. I can tell when he's stressed. I took an animal behavior class on body language and many other classes.  Plus I took him to the vet when this first started happening.  What gets me is that he is good for others. Has done training classes. He loves to play ball and make sure we play all the time. We go to dog park. He's good around other animals. Could be the most lovable dog I've ever had . Except for one thing, he bites us !! I have tried everything that trainers suggested.  This little dog is special to me.  It saddens me to want to do so much with him but I cant.  Anybody out there share my pain?

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Hi Lisa, I've just read this thread with interest. It looks to me as if you have a few problems - which the nilif program should help with tremendously.  He needs to learn that you are in ch

How old was he when you brought him home.  "Around a month"?  He should have been with his litter until at least 8 weeks to learn proper socialization.  He may view you as part of his "litter" and thi

Has he been neutered?  I have a male Shih Tzu, who is five now, he weighed 1.5 lbs when I brought him home at 8 weeks old. But this tiny little puppy did not want me doing any type of grooming to him,

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Pawz4me

Welcome, Lisa. Sorry you're having such a bad problem with your dog.

Under what circumstances does he bite? Can you give us some specific examples?

What do you mean you can tell when he's stressed? Are you just saying you think you're proficient at reading canine body language and you can "see" the bite coming a few seconds before it happens, or do you mean that he's frequently stressed and that's when he bites? What scenarios stress him? How do you react when you sense that he's stressed?

Have you implemented something like the Nothing In Life is Free plan and really, really stuck with it for an extended period of time (at least several months of very consistently implementing it)?

How do you (and your husband) react when he bites?

I know that's a lot of questions. But if you can give us details it will help.

My initial impression, just based on what you've written, is that he's a spoiled little brat who knows he can boss mom and dad around. He doesn't bite other people because he's unsure of his standing with them. With you and your husband he feels that he's firmly in charge. And you need to change that. Taking him with you everywhere and playing with him all the time isn't how you change it. That's reinforcing his notion that he's in charge.

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the first time he bit me was when he was around a month. He went under our bed . When I reached under to get him , he growled  and bit me . I wasn’t expecting that at all from him. He had been such a good little guy. I couldn’t see him to well when I reached under. I thought maybe I scared him. I thought it was a fluke.

     When he was old enough I put him in training classes. When I would put his harness on he would bite my hands. It wasn’t a puppy bite. He made me bleed. . I told the trainer . We then did one on one. He was obedient in everything that he did. Very smart. I don’t remember exactly what happened but the trainer  had to show me how to lay him on his side. It took a while for him to surrender. He didn’t try to bite the trainer. I worked with him at home with the command . He was so full of energy as a puppy is so I played with him a lot . He would listen to everything I said . He was very eager to learn. It’s been 2 yrs so I’m a little fuzzy on things.  I don’t remember the situation but he bit me . There was never a warning he would lunge and bite. I put him on his side the way the trainer taught me. I stayed on the floor with him for over an hour. I know that because I put a clock in front of me to see how long it would take for him to surrender. He did everything he could to try and get up. He’s a very strong dog. He yelped and screamed the whole time. I finally acted over an hour gave up . I was exhausted.  I then put him in his crate . He fell asleep right of way. 
     He wasn’t food  aggressive right of way. We came home from training one day , I put food down for him ,I needed to move his bowl and he lunged at me. From then on you couldn’t get near his food. I tried a private trainer . The only thing she showed me was to put him in his crate when he ate . Only give him 10 mins to eat.  When she was there he was perfect. The session was only an hour and it cost me $100 . She wanted to see him by his self . We took him to her house for a puppy play time. He stayed half the day . When we picked him up she said he was real good. When she was brushing him he let her. I started to brush him and he turned around to bite me. She went over got him by the leash he fell off the bench and was hanging she didn’t even react I grabbed him and put him on the bench. We were angry at how she treated him.’At one point she said maybe it’s time to find him a new home. That upset me . We left never to return.

      I took a body language seminar at petsmart. It taught me a lot. I talked to my vet to see if they gave me good information. Everything checked out. He’s is always yawning. Before I new what it meant I thought he was always tired. When I see him doing that I don’t bother him. We were going back to training class because I let the trainer he had the first time know what he was doing with his food. We were gonna work on it . I went to the 2nd visit with his bowl in hand. He had quit. I remember he mentioned if the store finds out he’s aggressive they will band him from the store. This is at petco our regular store. He dose good when being groomed. . I really got depressed about him and gave up  hope . I  learned to watch him better . When I see him licking his lips or yawning I don’t bother him.

     Last year in the summer we joined another trainer . He’s from our petco . He trains there , and also does training on his own he has a facility near us. He’s trained with Cesar Milan . We went for the Saturday walks with a group and of course with him. We also went to his puppy playtime. There he wouldn’t come out from underneath my chair. Now I realize it was stressing him.  The classes stopped for winter.  
     I keep on trying different techniques. I believe he is all confused now. It’s my fault because I didn’t stay consistent . Every time he bites me I’m hurt and discouraged. I’ve learned to do it his way. When I got him my husband said he is the last dog we’re going to have. We can’t travel together sometimes.. we have nobody to watch them. We live out in Northern California and all our family is in southern. Yes I take him places with me because I know he like it . We get to spend time together and I know I can touch him and love him without being bit.   I do spoil him and my other dog Leo. Jasper is pushy with Leo sometimes but, they enjoy playing together . I know Im probly not doing the right things when it comes to jasper but, I feel that I’ve run out of options. I feel he need intensive training  but he’s good for everyone else . Being truthful, I’m afraid of him. I’m probly not doing or giving him the right things he needs since I’ve given in to him. I won’t give him up . I brought him into our house.’he’s very special to me inspire of his bad behavior. Yes your right he is spoiled. I don’t know how get him to stop biting me to this day.. we’re not rich ppl to put him back in training  for the 3rd time. We will be going for Saturday walks with the group when it starts up. I get on the Internet and look for ideas for him. Now I’m confused. He loves to greet ppl when we go out . He’s gets excited and wats his tail. I’ve been thinking it is a positive thing . I read now that sometimes wagging can me mean they are nervous and stressed .also unsure. My husband says that jasper act like me . He says he’s bipolar like me.  I don’t think I answered all your questions but there’s so much to post about him. It’s hard to know where to start. I’m new to posting . I’m learning the rules as I go along. Oh to your question about reaction. I  use to get mad and push him away with my slipper because he lunges and doesn’t stop . I yell at him , tell him no . I use a stern voice . Now what I’ve been doing when he bites and lunges is calmly and quietly get up if I’m sitting down. Move forward toward him to try to show him I’m not backing down.  I watch a lot of  Cesar Milan . Before I couldn’t get near his food bowl when feeding. What I do now is put his bowl between my feet and stand over his food while he eats and he lets me  near his food. I am not gonna give him up  he’s our family . I wonder if there anybody out there who has a dog like him. Please let me know everything I’m doing wrong. Thank you for your reply

I’m sorry so long. He bites me with practically everything .  You just made me realize something . The only times he doesn’t bite me is when he’s doing something he likes. He lets me stick my fingers in his mouth when he has put something in  his mouth. I can brush his teeth with no b problem.  

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Marlene
4 hours ago, lees@54 said:

the first time he bit me was when he was around a month. He went under our bed . When I reached under to get him , he growled  and bit me .

How old was he when you brought him home.  "Around a month"?  He should have been with his litter until at least 8 weeks to learn proper socialization.  He may view you as part of his "litter" and think he can be aggressive with you if he never learned by being corrected by the other puppies and his Mama.

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Your dog is adorable! I got him at 6 weeks. He was the biggest one of the litter. I was so excited when I went to see them for the first time. I didn't take my time getting to know him. wasn't to near his siblings. He was awake and all the others were sleeping. I picked him up and new I wanted him. I believe the woman I bought him from didn't care about temperament. My husband was there with me. He is very observant. I now remember I did go visit him one time before I picked him up. He was sleeping at the time. There is a lot of things that I didn't pay attention to. my husband saw that the father was outside. I asked the woman I bought jasper from why he was outside. she said he is too active and jumps all over at times. I didn't think anything of it. Her dogs are so cute and that's all I looked at.  growing up we had shih tzus and Lhasa's . I have never had a dog that is aggressive. I get very discouraged at times . I look at his little face and that all goes away. About 2 months ago he collapsed he at home. we rushed him to the emergency hospital . he was barely breathing. he was taken to the back and worked on, an hour later hes was as if nothing ever happened. I am sorry ,I got off topic. He is perfect at the vets all the time. I am always worried he is going to bite. I do tell them that he does bite when hes stressed. They come back with him and tell me how sweet he is. My husband says he must take after his dad. After writing you the last text, I read it to myself. I have tried a lot of things, but not long term. I had 3 surgeries on my shoulder last year.It was hard for me to take him to groups. December sixth I had shoulder replacement. It has been hard at times for me to work with him. He is affectionate towards my husband. Puts his head on him ,lets him rub him. He gets on his lap.I have never been able to do that with him. you are probably right, he treats me like a littermate. Like I said before ,I can not afford a private trainer these days . I do not know what else to do,this is why I joined the forum . plus I love shih tzus.  I am so happy to get your replies. it great to know there are ppl who care. I will have to teach myself how to post pictures. I did see somewhere on the forum a post that helps you post picutures.

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Pawz4me

Yes, what @Marlene asked--how old was he when you got him?

I would back off the Cesar Milan crap. Yes, crap. I have zero respect for him as a trainer. Few people who really understand dogs (IMO) believe he's anything other than an empty headed pretty boy who has massively harmed an incredibly number of dogs. I know of SO many dogs his techniques have absolutely ruined. It makes me sad. I think he's maybe improved a little in recent years, but . . . he'll never be able to make up for all the harm he's caused. IMHO, of course.

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I did not know that.  That’s sad to hear. I posted another post about an hour ago. Well I think I posted it . I brought  him home when he was 6 weeks.  I looked over my posts and it looked like I posted it. When Jasper has gone to classes and the walks . It’s all about praise and  positive reinforcement. Is that what is recognized here? 

I am not sure if I posted right?  Last post tell how old he was when we brought him home . Also a lttle about him when he was still at breeders

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ParadiseTzu

Has he been neutered?  I have a male Shih Tzu, who is five now, he weighed 1.5 lbs when I brought him home at 8 weeks old. But this tiny little puppy did not want me doing any type of grooming to him, went nuts when I tried, flinging himself around me, biting me.  Many times leaving my hands bloody. He was on a grooming table that I didn’t want him to fall off of so it was hard to really get a hold of him with him flinging and biting, but when he snarled and bit I held him by the scruff of the neck like his mama would have done and firmly told him no. Held him like that each time until he settled to listen.  That didn’t completely eliminate the aggressive behavior but certainly was getting thru to him. Then I had him neutered at 4.5 months old.  That stopped all aggressiveness in him and it has never returned. He’s a very sweet and loving dog today

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Pawz4me
10 hours ago, lees@54 said:

I did not know that.  That’s sad to hear. I posted another post about an hour ago. Well I think I posted it . I brought  him home when he was 6 weeks.  I looked over my posts and it looked like I posted it. When Jasper has gone to classes and the walks . It’s all about praise and  positive reinforcement. Is that what is recognized here? 

I am not sure if I posted right?  Last post tell how old he was when we brought him home . Also a lttle about him when he was still at breeders

Six weeks is much better than four, but it's still a problem. Most good breeders won't let small breed puppies leave their mom and siblings until they're closer to 12 weeks old. Smaller breeds aren't generally strong/sturdy enough to leave the knowledgeable care of their breeder until they're close to 12 weeks old, and a LOT of learning how to behave goes on in those extra weeks. One of the most important things a puppy learns from its mom and siblings is bite inhibition, and that happens during those extra weeks.

We don't recognize any one way of training here. We're all free to do our own thing and post our own opinions. Mine is the Cesar Milan has some seriously wrong stuff going on, and I personally know dogs who have been harmed and needed rehabilitation by a good trainer. The good trainers I know (sadly) used to "joke" that CM's show was very good for their business. Let that sink in.

There is no one right way of training. You do what works for the individual dog. A good trainer will know many methods for dealing with unwanted behaviors. All of them take time and consistency and dedication from the owner. I don't think praise/positive reinforcement is always the way to go. Just like humans, I think dogs benefit from constructive criticism sometimes. But that's a whole different thing than some of the stuff that CM advocates. Like holding a dog down until it submits. That's completely wrongheaded, IMO. It assumes the dog is so stupid that he thinks you're another dog. No dog I've ever met has been anywhere near that stupid. Instead of thinking you're doing what his mom or an alpha dog would do, the dog thinks you're a crazy human who acts in ways that other humans don't and therefore can't be trusted. It sets up an adversarial, or at the very least a distrustful, relationship. There's nothing to be gained by that. Sure it works for some dogs. They completely shut down. That's not what I want for any dog, ever.

One reason I love the Nothing in Life is Free program I linked to above is that it's a neutral approach to training a dog its place. But it has to be done consistently to have any chance of working.

Edited by Pawz4me
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Oh pawz4me! I wrote you a long text tell you more about jasper and some about Leo and Peanut. Somehow I his something and it went away . I can’t find it. I will update you on yesterday. jasper and I were on the couch. I left the room , then came back. Sat down . I don’t remember what  I was trying to do . I touched jaspers paws and he lunged at me. Usually when he lunged I back away and he continues to lunge. I often wonder what he will do if I didn’t stop him. I always back away. Lately I have been standing up and pushing him back. Last night I had my phone in my hand. When he lived I put my phone up to his mouth. I pushed him back and he was still trying to bite . He finally stopped when I kept the phone up to his mouth and pushed and lunged at him. Oh my gosh I’m arguing with my dog! I would like to know how I find out about nothing in life is free. I thought you said something about a link?  Yesterday I took him with me to petco to get dog food. We went over to big lots there was a little jacket  . I bought it. We went outside . I knew if I changed it outside In front of the store he would let me. He had a jacket on already.  He had to get a short hair cut and it’s cold where we live. The jackets I have for him Velcro around the neck and under the belly. Easy to put on. He let me change it out there  in front of the store . I feel it was because we wer out and about . When we’re out and about he lets me touch him all over. Im relaxed with him when we’re out of the house. He used to let me put the jackets on before . He kind of stopped letting me . Plus I’m nervous to put one on him. The reason he has one on is he is of the short cut. He had a big mat towards the base of his tail. She said she tried to come it out . It was to close to the skin. She shaved about 3 inches of the tail at the base. He still has a waterfall tail but it’s small. If he would only let me brush him like Leo does , it wouldn’t have gotten matted. Anyhow, his tail doesn’t cover his bottom. It always has. It’s bothering him . He’s exposed . I checked online  everybody says the same thing  I’m thinking. My mom has a shih tzu also. His name is Brando Henry . My mom had him groomed. This was long ago. When he came home he started hiiding and drafting his bottom. My mom took him to the vet. The vet said , he feels naked . He always had long fur . She cut him down short. He has allergies . She washes him with a prescription shampoo. So I’m think jaspe feels naked . That’s also why he’s wearing his jacket . I like jackets and bandanas. I would like to learn about the  training technique you talked about.. I am not sure what I’m doing as far as standing up to him is a good thing to do? I don’t know if I’m doing anything right?  Whenever my husband has a chance I would like his to show me how to post a picture. He’s an adorable looking little dog:. If I wrote about peanut in this post. He’s my cat.

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I’m sorry my posts are so long. I will try to shorten them. I think I put and explanation mark in front of your name pawz4me? My husband said that wasn’t good. I’m sorry if I said something wrong. 
I also didn’t know that on one post I address all those who replied to me. I thought I was to answer separately. 
 I brought jasper home when he was 6’weeks. He didn’t even weigh a pound.. he was neutered at 6’momths of age
 

 

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Pawz4me

You're doing fine, Lisa. It takes everybody awhile to get used to how a new-to-them forum works.

Here's my short answer to what happened with Jasper yesterday: He should not be on the furniture. Period. Not for a long time--at least several months, while you work with him on improving his attitude. Furniture privileges are something a dog earns by being good, by being respectful. Which he is definitely NOT doing.

If you look at the first post I made, right after your original post, you'll see "Nothing in Life is Free." I made it into a link, so you can click on it and get more information. If you Google the term you'll get all sorts of links to read. The short description of how it works is that Jasper works for every single thing he gets. That includes your attention, food, a toy, being taken out for a walk. Everything. But the work is pretty easy. All he has to do is sit, or down, or give a paw, or whatever thing you decide to ask of him. It's like teaching him to say "please." It's an attitude adjustment. Right now he thinks he controls you. Nothing in Life is Free is a way to gently teach him that YOU control all things. It requires dedication and consistency. Lots and lots of consistency, from you and your husband and anyone else who is in his life regularly. If you truly want his attitude to change you're going to have to work hard, patiently and consistently. He's not going to be a quick fix. He's essentially telling you that he's in charge and you don't touch him unless he says it's okay. He's jerking you around. Only you can stop that. Consulting all the trainers in the world won't help if you don't set up boundaries and enforce them (by making him obey, making him work for everything he gets, etc.). And if you're right and he's giving off stress signals--it's because he feels that he's in charge, and he doesn't want to be. That's very stressful for a dog. By taking back control you will almost certainly end up with a happier, much less stressed dog. But it's going to take time and consistency.

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Hello, I did some reading on nothin in life is free. My husband sat with me while I read. It’s seems like a good fit for jasper. Even though my husband sat me, I know it’s going to be hard for him and me. I know we can do it. Like you said ,  it needs to be consistent. Now I’m not trying to say that my husband will break the rules all by himself. Because i will probly be along with him. I’m going to read and read to my husband as well. As you said we both have to be on board. The good thing is it’s only him and I  in the house. I’m the one who is in charge of jasper. I worked with him on training . He is a very intelligent little dog. When we’re playing , he looks so interested . I taught him the name of 5’of his toys. When I ask him to fetch one  he is really excited. I feel that nilif will be a good fit for the 3 of us. It’s hard to train him when my husband doesn’t listen . This is why I will read nothing in life if free a couple of times to him. It’s hard to discipline jasper when he runs to my husband . I let my husband read your post pawz4me. This way he knows that  others use it too. I’m really going to need the forums help with this. For about almost a year , jasper has been running us.

Leo at times likes to lay on the couch. He’s my 12 yr old. Does he need to stay off the couch as well? We feel he deserves to lay around. He’s a wonderful, lay back , sweetheart . Never a problem.  It’s hard at times to discipline jasper, Leo likes to be in on what he thinks is fun. I don’t discourage Leo . I like when he’s assertive. He’s assertive in a good way. Nothing like jasper. If it can include him on this  I know he would enjoy it. He’s very shy. I encourage Leo to get in on things. You can teach and old dog new tricks . How does one work with one dog when you have 2?

Question, i have replied to paws4me post. If I receive another post after I’ve posted this one. Do I start a new topic to reply?  Not sure how it works.  

We will be doing nothing in life is free. I know it will be hard . Thank goodness I don’t have more than one person that needs to get on board .  
jasper is very stubborn. He’s not going to get off the couch without a fight. He will also try to bite us. Is it ok to use my racquet to quire him off the couch? It’s the only way I can think of to get him off. 

Jasper and I will work hard . A big change for both of us. The only time I have ever  touched his belly was when I first brought him home. It would be awesome to be able to touch him and not get bit.

Do I need to stop taking him places with me? He enjoys going with me to Walgreens. We go through the drive thru. They hand out treats for the dogs. We go to petsmart and petco to get food also.

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I read  nothing in life is free. Jasper is very pushy. i don't know where to start first? I understand the rules. keeping him off the couch will be very hard. we have a glass end table that he likes to lay on. It took months to get him to stay off. when he thinks I am not paying attention he still gets on it. I will tell him off. he stares at me , doesn't get off. I repeat myself several times, he stares at me. Finally I walk towards the end table ,he finally gets off. As I am struggling to keep him off the end table, he is looking at me the whole time. I feel like he is daring me to get him down. One very stubborn dog.

 

I do not think I replied in the right place?

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Pawz4me

Lisa, I think the best place to start is . . .  just start. It will take a week or so for you to get used to it. Yes, I said you, not Jasper. It will take you awhile to really get in the habit of asking him for a command or trick every single time before giving him anything. So the first week or so is more about training yourself than him.

I wouldn't worry about Leo. It sounds like he's fine and doesn't need any attitude adjustment! If it bothers Jasper . . . too bad, so sad. He'll learn to "earn" what Leo has by behaving better.

If Jasper's refusal to move off furniture is a big problem, then hook his leash on and let him drag it around all day. He probably won't like that either, but again . . . too bad. When he gets on furniture you tell him one time to get off. One time. No repeating the command. If he doesn't get off then you pick up the leash and pull him off. Right now he doesn't respect you at all, and therefore sees no reason that he should obey. You've got to earn his respect.

ETA: I think it will be okay if you still take him places. But remember--you implement NILIF the entire time. Every single time. So if he's going with you in the car you make him sit before you open the car door for him, make him sit (or down or shake or whatever) before you let him out of the car, etc. Always, always demand that he "give" you something (obeying a command) before you "give" him anything.

Edited by Pawz4me
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Hi pawz4me,  do you think I should start a new topic regarding, NILIF training? This way I’m not bombarding you with a lot of questions ?   

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Me and my husband were reading over NILIF about a half hour ago. My husband pointed out to me the things that Leo is doing . After taking Leo outside and feeding him I sat down , got on the computer . A few minutes later Leo jumped up , sat beside me, pawed at me and started whining.  Peanut (my cat) follows my husband all over the house. He always wants to be fed. This is going to benefit them as well. I understand what you are saying. Both dogs are starting tomorrow. I completely forgot about using the leash. I’m so happy I can still take him places. As for Leo , he recently started coming out oof his shell. But not in the best way. He’s learned all jaspers ways. My husband is on board. I don’t think I need to ask for help through the forum. I didn’t want to bombard you with all my questions like I wrote earlier. You have answered my questions. I will do my best not to get ahead of myself. I will first start by keeping him off the couch .  How about when we leave, how does that work? 

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He doesn’t bother about it. I tell them, I will be back. Leo has never complained. He is usually sleeping. Sometimes jasper will run to the door . He gets a little confused . I tell him , no not today. He runs over to the couch , sits down  and watches me leave. 

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How long before I can invite him up on the couch? My punctuation stinks. I was telling my husband , I need to take an English class. I guess first I need to get him to stay off the couch.

what I’m wondering is, when I am gone , how do I keep him off the couch?  Does it matter  if he gets on when I’m gone ?

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When I take jasper out ,  there’s always ppl that approach him. He does the whole pushy thing.  How do I approach it?   

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We had a little incident this am. I left for physical therapy. husband was at home with Jasper and Leo .Somebody came to the door ,my husband answered it and Jasper ran out.(he usually does not run out). He called Jasper to come into the house. He came in the door then he turned around and tried to leave. my husband  was able to get him back in, not without Jasper growling at him. He swatted him on his bottom, then Jasper growled again. my husband said he returned to the couch as if nothing happened. How do we handle this using nothing in life is free?

This morning before giving them their food , I asked them to sit. They did it the first time I asked so I gave them their food. I had good results taking them outside.

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Pawz4me
11 hours ago, lees@54 said:

He doesn’t bother about it. I tell them, I will be back. Leo has never complained. He is usually sleeping. Sometimes jasper will run to the door . He gets a little confused . I tell him , no not today. He runs over to the couch , sits down  and watches me leave. 

 

10 hours ago, lees@54 said:

How long before I can invite him up on the couch? My punctuation stinks. I was telling my husband , I need to take an English class. I guess first I need to get him to stay off the couch.

what I’m wondering is, when I am gone , how do I keep him off the couch?  Does it matter  if he gets on when I’m gone ?

I wouldn't worry much about what he does while you're gone. I'd concentrate on what happens when you're there. Remember, ultimately what you're working on here is his attitude toward you/making him respect you. So what matters is that when you're on the couch it belongs to you, and he only gets to be beside you on it when he earns it.

 

10 hours ago, lees@54 said:

When I take jasper out ,  there’s always ppl that approach him. He does the whole pushy thing.  How do I approach it?   

This is really just a little outside the scope of what you're working on with NILIF. But as he gets better at respecting you/following your commands you can start working on having him sit when he's meeting people. But that's really hard for a lot of dogs to do. And like NILIF it's something you have to work on consistently and patiently.

 

3 hours ago, lees@54 said:

We had a little incident this am. I left for physical therapy. husband was at home with Jasper and Leo .Somebody came to the door ,my husband answered it and Jasper ran out.(he usually does not run out). He called Jasper to come into the house. He came in the door then he turned around and tried to leave. my husband  was able to get him back in, not without Jasper growling at him. He swatted him on his bottom, then Jasper growled again. my husband said he returned to the couch as if nothing happened. How do we handle this using nothing in life is free?

This morning before giving them their food , I asked them to sit. They did it the first time I asked so I gave them their food. I had good results taking them outside.

Again, like meeting people on walks this is a little outside the purpose of NILIF. But again, as you (and your husband) enforce NILIF consistently over time, he should begin to listen/obey more overall. But meeting people on walks and at the door are pretty high level events for dogs, and it can take a LOT of work to get them to greet people properly in those circumstances. Like all training, it takes consistency and time. 

Getting them to sit before giving them their food is perfect! It sounds like such a little thing, but when you do it over and over and over for different things the message starts to sink in to them that you're the one in control of everything.

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Should I have jaspers leash on him most of the day? I am having a hard time keeping him off the couch.  What I did was, put him on the floor and ask him to sit . When he sat I let him up on the couch. I know that’s not the way. Although he likes biting me a lot I, he always relaxed with me when I’m on the couch. I used to sleep out on the couch with him when he was a baby. It’s hard for me to have him on the floor and me on the couch. But I know jasper has to see me as a leader. Especially if I want it to work. There was something in one of the paragraphs on the NILIF  link. It had to do with furniture as something positive for the dog. I’m not too sure what it refers to? Jasper does love the couch.  This is all very straight forward with me . Except I’m having a problem with the couch   Is there anything I can do to make it easier on me?

on the other hand, Leo is doing good. He jumped up on the couch . I got him off , asked him to sit. It took a few seconds for him to sit. When he did I let him up on the couch.  I don’t have a hard time asking Leo to get off the couch. He barely started wanting to get up on it.  Thank you for your time pawz 

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Pawz4me

Until he understands that he doesn't get on the couch without your permission, and until he gets off when you tell him to, or at least doesn't protest if you pick him up and move him to the floor--then yes, I'd leave his leash on. If it gets aggravating you can buy a cheap nylon leash, cut it fairly short (a couple of feet) and let him drag that. You just need something you can grab (besides his body) to enforce commands. 

Many things are positive for a dog. Getting on the couch or bed (or other furniture), food/treats, going for a walk, toys, a particular dog bed, attention from their people, etc.  Those are the things that he needs to understand you control, not him. And you make him understand that you control those things by having him work for access to them by performing a command or trick before he gets access to them.

This is going to be much harder on you than him. These little dogs are so cute and can be so endearing that all of us want to baby and spoil them. That's no doubt a big part of why we all chose the breed. But they still need discipline and training to be the best they can be. And that's on us. Remember that you will be highly rewarded if you can remain strong and consistent. His attitude should improve noticeably. But be prepared that this is something you'll probably always have to enforce just a little bit. Dogs like Jasper need to be constantly reminded that they aren't the boss. But it should get to be a habit with you, and that will make it a lot easier. 

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